“Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.” ~~ Martin Luther King
We have all heard it said that holding a grudge is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die. We know that holding on to past anger and resentment eats away at out own happiness. Yet, we still battle with letting it go.
Why is it so easy to hold a grudge?
When you’re hurt by someone you love and trust, you might become angry, sad or confused. If you dwell on hurtful events or situations, grudges filled with resentment, vengeance and hostility can take root.
What are the benefits to you for forgiving someone?
Letting go of grudges and bitterness can make way for compassion, kindness and peace. Forgiveness can lead to:
- Healthier relationships
- Greater spiritual and psychological well-being
- Less anxiety, stress and hostility
- Lower blood pressure
- Fewer symptoms of depression
- Lower risk of alcohol and substance abuse
How do you stop holding a grudge and forgive?? (this is the hard one for me)
1. Acknowledge the problem. Figure out what it is that’s causing you to hold a grudge. You have to know what the problem is in order to solve it.
2. Share your feelings. A grudge can form when an issue isn’t fully confronted. Without being judgmental about yourself or another, clarify your feelings on the situation. Communicate with the other person about the issue. Whether you work it out on your own or involved the other person, you may feel more relieved by releasing that build up.
3. Accept what is. Choose to create your own healing, with or without an apology. Don’t wait for the person you are upset with to come around.
5. Don’t dwell on it. Once you have decided to move on, keep on moving.
6. Let it go. Letting go allows room for peace and happiness..
7. Forgive. Of course forgiving does not mean you will forget the issue. Forgiving isn’t the easiest to do especially when you’ve endured a lot of hurt and pain, but it’s the only way to truly let go and have peace.
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