A man worked in a post office. His job was to process all mail that had illegible addresses. One day a letter came to his desk, addressed in shaky handwriting to God. He thought, “I better open this one and see what it’s all about.” So he opened it and it read: “Dear God, I am a 83 year old widow living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had a hundred dollars in it which was all the money I had until my next pension check.”
“Next Sunday is Mother’s Day, and I had invited my last two friends over for dinner. Without that money, I have nothing to buy food with.” “I have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me?” The postal worker was touched, and went around showing the letter to all the others. Each of them dug into his wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected 96 dollars, which they put into an envelope and sent over to her.
The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of the nice thing they had done. Mother’s Day came and went, and a few days later came another letter from the old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read, “Dear God, How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me?” “Because of your generosity, I was able to fix a lovely dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day, and I told my friends of your wonderful gift. “By the way, there was 4 dollars missing. It was no doubt those thieves at the post office!!
I have heard some variation of this story for years. It is funny but it also drives home a point, we don’t always know the whole story of what is happening.
I had a conversation with my friend, Clementine*, yesterday that made me think of this story. Clementine is giving a surprise party for another friend. Because of the party, she had to decline and invitation to attend an event they regularly attend together. The party girl is angry with Clementine for declining the invitation and the vicious cycle of everyone being angry has begun.
I am a big fan of Modern Family. Last night we watched an episode where one character, Phil was trying to fire another character, Mitchell. Mitchell has been providing discount legal work for Phil’s office as a favor. He’s been late with a couple of reports, so everyone thinks he’s lazy. Nice guy Phil is looking for a way to gently fire his slacker brother-in-law. As it turns out, Mitch was tardy with those reports on purpose so he would seem less appealing to his temporary colleagues. In other words, he was looking to get out.
How true is this for most of us? We are so caught up in our own issues, struggles and life that we are unable to see those around us. Our me-centric way of thinking doesn’t allow us to see the struggles of others. Ian MacLaren, a noted Scotsman, author of “Beside the Bonnie Brier Bush,” is oft-quoted and his words offer wise counsel: “Be kind. Everyone you meet is carrying a heavy burden.” 
I am trying to change the way I look at everyone, and the way I treat everyone. The woman who flips me off in traffic is carrying a heavy load. The check-out clerk with extreme piercings and body art is carrying a heavy load. My critical in-laws and all those who have been mean to me over the years are carrying a heavy load. My neighbors who drive too fast are carrying a heavy load. Their load isn’t made lighter because I can’t see it; Just as my load isn’t made lighter because you are unaware.
I am spending some time evaluating how I treat other people. I’m taking the advice of Sean Bean‘s mam who according to Sean said ‘Listen to people and treat people as you find them. There’s an inherent goodness in most people. Don’t pre-judge people – that was me Mam’s advice anyway.’ Perhaps you’ll join me?
*names changed to protect the secret
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